I remember the early days of this Covid-19 pandemic when people, in Europe mostly, go to their window at night to clap to show their appreciation for the healthcare workers. I can not tell for the doctors and nurses out there, but it could be nice to see people are graceful. Problem is, it should be more, much more than that. Symbolic supports are great, but what is greater is concrete actions, like improvement of working condition, pay raise or just simply respecting the precautions to limit the spread of the virus. Can you imagine risking your life to save people who don’t even care enough to wear a mask, for a miserable salary, and all you get is some claps? Would you feel ironic, exasperated? Would you feel insulted?

Somehow it is the same being a mother. There are no shortage of books, fiction or not, poems, movies, articles in newspaper and so on about mother’s love. And there are mother’s day, women’s day. All those opportunities to show that you love mothers, you are graceful for mother’s sacrifices. Mothers are showered with praises, flowers and cards. But you know what, you are just in love with the concept of mother, you just praise mother in general. In face of a real mother, one that you know, what have you done for her concretely?

Maybe we do like some flowers, but that is not what we need. We need to be sure that our career will not be impacted in any way when we become a mother. We need support, organized and mandated support, to help us balancing our work and family lives. We need people to realize that raising a child is the work and responsibility of the whole society, not just their mother.

So please don’t clap.